MIKE'S BIOGRAPHY

Why is it I always have to write the drummer’s bio? This is the second one in a row and I’m starting to think it some sort of “Spinal Tap-ian” conspiracy. I’m definitely gonna have to look into this one.

But speaking of conspiracies, I’m not sure what to make of Mike. For those of you who don’t stay in the loop with these kind of things, Mike is the new drummer of The Suburban Pop Project. I would like to tell you his last name but so far he hasn’t mentioned it to me. Truth be told, Mike doesn’t say a whole lot, he just sits behind the drum kit dispensing liberal doses of rock. I try and go a little deeper with the guy and get him to open up a bit on topics like, “Hey Mike, what’s your last name?” or “Hey Mike, what is your favourite colour?” or even “Hey Mike, is AC-DC a witty caricature of rock and roll stereo types or a band of archaic misogynistic dinosaurs stuck in the past?” but he just quietly smiles from behind his manly beard and giggles something inaudibly beneath his breath.

Something just ain’t right here…

If you wanna talk about those strong silent types that are shrouded in mystery, well you should get a load of Mike. I’m starting to suspect he may be more than he seems. He always seems to be at the right place at the right time to deliver the rock. His exceptional skills coupled with his lack of last name and seemingly non-existent history, leads me to suspect that he is some form of deep-cover operative sent to spy on the The SPP and report back to some unknown government agency on how to harness our mastery of rock and roll for their own evil needs. Either that, or he is some form of robot. Maybe from the future or something…

Regardless, I’ll keep digging for the truth on this one. But in the meantime, just smile and wave to Mike and don’t let him know we’ve blown his cover.

– by Jeff